A muslim Nigerian woman has sparked widespread reactions online after sharing an emotional account of her distress upon learning that her husband is planning to take another wife this month, December.
In a lengthy post circulating on social media, the woman, who identified herself as the second wife, said she has been unable to sleep, concentrate, or function normally since the revelation.
According to her, what hurts the most is not just her husband’s decision, but the calm and unbothered attitude of his first wife.
“I don’t even understand why his first wife is so relaxed about everything. She’s acting like it doesn’t concern her at all. She still cooks, laughs, goes to work, and minds her business as if nothing is happening,” she wrote.
The woman admitted that while the first wife appears unaffected, she herself has been crying every night and living in constant anxiety.
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“Meanwhile me, I’m here crying every night. I’m restless. I can’t concentrate,” she said.
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She added that her husband had promised not to marry another wife after her, a promise she says now feels broken, deepening her emotional pain and insecurity.
Expressing strong opposition to polygamy, the woman said she does not want to share her husband with anyone else and feels threatened by the arrival of a new wife.
“I don’t like sharing my husband at all. I worked too hard to build my place in this home. I won’t allow any woman to come and scatter what I have,” she stated.
She further admitted that the first wife’s calmness is making her even more uncomfortable, as she cannot understand how someone in her position could appear so unaffected.
In a troubling part of her narration, the woman revealed that a friend had suggested they visit a babalawo (traditional priest) over the weekend, although she did not confirm whether she intends to follow through with the suggestion.
The post has generated intense debate online, with many users urging the woman to prioritise her mental health, while others questioned why she married into a polygamous setup if she could not cope with its realities.
Some commenters sympathised with her pain, while others pointed out that the first wife’s calmness may be a coping mechanism or a result of emotional detachment.
Do you think a 2nd wife is in any position to judge her senior wife’s reaction or stop the husband from marrying another wife?
